Explaining the US application process to Indian parents: the exhilarating experience

Explaining the American application process to Indian parents is tricky. Here’s a glimpse into what it’s really like to bring your perplexed parents on board.

“Mummy, Papa, I want to apply to colleges in the U.S.!” 

While these words can lead to an interesting adventure, they largely lead to an endless stream of sometimes repetitive questions. I believe that sharing my journey and how I made it possible can guide other prospective students to follow their dreams and achieve the same.

Explaining the American application process to Indian parents is tricky, and it can be a journey of diagrams, connections, analogies, and sometimes futile attempts to establish the same. Here’s a glimpse into what it’s really like to bring your perplexed parents on board when you say, “I want to go to the US for undergraduate studies”.

Grades

While this may be expected, something unexpected is that US universities require the grades from all 4 years of high school. This is a source of confusion considering Indian universities barely care about final grades in senior year, considering there’s a minimum criterion (mostly 75%). 

“How do you submit it?” they ask. 

“Your school is supposed to send it.” 

This typically leads to the question, “Can’t someone just cheat?”, and the truth is, people do. 

At the time, it is natural to not want to tell them this (the volatility is still to come, after all!), so you talk about how every agreement is binding, and what the consequences of violating this covenant can be. You can tell they’re not very convinced.

SAT

It is sometimes perceived as the “main” or only factor in US admissions. In all fairness, parents are not the only ones guilty of this error. 

“Bro, JEE is too tough for me, I’ll just take the SAT and go to MIT” is a common sentence around here. 

“I’ll also have to take the SAT.” 

“Yes, we know. But getting a good score on that will get you in, right?” 

Alas, if only it could. Explaining how it works is difficult. 

“If I get a good score on it, I get considered. If my score is bad, I won't get in.”

 This commonly leads to an exchange of looks. This leads to the question: “If your grades and SAT score aren’t enough, what more do you need?”

Extracurriculars

“What do you mean extracurriculars are not extra? You’re telling me you need to do stuff to get in?” 

This incredulous question is often dreaded by many, considering academics predominantly take priority in India. 

“So you’re telling me that the coding thing you do can count towards your application?” your parents ask, trying to wrap their heads around how this could possibly matter. You explain that extracurriculars show dedication and time management, but they’re still not convinced.

“But surely you can blow them away with amazing grades!” they say. 

You try to explain that US universities look for “well-rounded students,” which almost always leads to a debate over what matters more: simply grades or the ability to juggle academics with other activities.

Essays

“HOW much do you need to write?!” they exclaim in disbelief. 

This part is arguably the most confusing part of the process for Indian students and parents. 

“What do you even write about in an essay?” your parents ask, their eyes narrowing rapidly. 

You explain that US colleges want to know about your personality, your beliefs, your experiences, and your goals—not just your grades.

“What are you supposed to say? Just tell them you’re a good student” they suggest helpfully.

When you tell them your essays have to shed light on who you are outside of school, they wonder why colleges would care about playing the piano or community service. And then the coup de grâce: “Can’t you just tell them you’re a good student?”

Letters of Recommendation

This part requires tact. Letters of recommendation aren’t as common in Indian schools, and the idea of needing teachers and mentors to vouch for your character and abilities can seem strange. You explain that these letters are supposed to show who you are in the classroom and in the community, not just your scores or performance in exams.

And that’s when they get suspicious: “So if a teacher doesn’t like you, can they say something bad?” 

Suddenly, you’re assuring them that you have a good relationship with your teachers, and you’re praying that no one asks for a letter from the math teacher you once disagreed with over a test grade.

Conclusion

Explaining the US college application process to Indian parents can be both challenging and rewarding. From SAT scores, to essays, and recommendation letters, each part adds its own complexity. But every question finally leads to bridging the gap between the two systems. While they may not fully understand holistic admissions, your parents’ concern comes from love and pride. Their questions are just a way of protecting you, ensuring what you work so hard for pays off.

In the end, bringing them on board is less about having them understand every detail and more about reassuring them that this dream is worth it. Despite all the questions, glances, and skeptical looks, your biggest strength is their support. And maybe, just maybe, you’re helping them see a different side of education–one where the journey is just as important as the destination.

~ Avi D. from India